So, Colapinto might join Alpine, indeed he might already be there by the time this article is published, and the European tracks are going to have to play nice and share their toys (races) with each other.
Ah! If it is not the arcane universe of the cost cap, one can always count on contracts to raise the temperature in F1! Doohan is already confirmed as the second Alpine driver. Now... maybe not so much. Colapinto was told "Sorry, no room, got two drivers already" by Williams, apparently in a pious state of wishing to honour existing contracts. He was then told the more accommodating, "Give us a moment to check the T&Cs, a.k.a. Small print, and we'll get back to you" by Alpine.
Meanwhile he formally of the light-side, and now of the dark-side, Darth Domenicali, having eased European fears of getting one race a decade with a robust "All is steady as she goes on my watch!" Is now in true Sith dark-side fashion stating, "Well... actually... I didn't lie as such, but that's never going to happen..." His published statement, may the force be forever with him, runs in part as follows. "So as always, we need to be balanced, knowing that we cannot follow only the pure direct financial proposition, because that is different from region to region, but it's up to us to propose to our stakeholders the right choice."
Top marks to his script writer! Let's unpack that. Like the force he first states "...we need to be balanced..." Beautiful! Like a Ballerina mid-pirouette? Like a bank account? Or like a wheelbarrow full of gold bars balanced against a truck-full of male bovine manure? What is being balanced? The avarice of Liberty against the needs of the teams? The pillaging of the track owners vaults against the fans' ability to still afford tickets?
Then my favourite of this particular pronouncement, "... knowing that we cannot follow only the pure direct financial proposition..." Art and beauty right there! I'd translate that as "The Middle East can afford to purchase all 25 races every season for the rest of time. This extreme, while financially attractive, would possibly annoy every other region on the calendar."
Ending with the sage-like, "...but it's up to us to propose to our stakeholders the right choice." Lovely ending on a polite note. I'd translate this as, "While all our stakeholders would prefer infinite Saudi/Qatar/UAE dollars forever, we know that losing 95% of our fan base in Europe and America would eventually hurt the sport. We will therefore take as much money as we can, pushing to the edge of the last cent (literally) that we can take from this marvellous region before we grudgingly leave the odd race in Europe, and a couple in the US as long as maximal dollars keep rolling in."
Boxing, Golf, to a lesser extent Cycling and Soccer, and recently Tennis have all sold-out to the dollars washing around the middle-eastern region. One can imagine the business meetings where the money-rich states keep holding up flash-cards displaying ever increasing numbers until they see the sports' owner's eyes go wide in astonishment. They then promptly utter the close-out phase, "Please sign here, here, here, and... here." Everything has a price.
I'm sure Darth Domenicali will find a sensible balance around three US races, three European races, plus Silverstone, not forgetting his home track in Imola, then the remaining 17 in the Middle East, which has the accidental impact of also being far greener, as all that flying around the world is eliminated. Indeed, I'd build a lovely circular railway between Saudi, Qatar, and the UAE to transport teams and cars between races. Even more fuel saving! Naturally there would be an "F1 Experience First Class" section on all these trains so fans can move between races with ease for just a few thousand per head...
Alpine! Thy name be naughty-naughty once more. Flavio, he of crash-gate fame, would now appear to be throwing contacts into the barriers. As noted in articles past, all contracts have a clear framework on how early exits can be obtained by either party. It is always possible. The only question is always "What's it going to cost me?" Then the lawyers all get a-talkin' and after they've earned a suitable slice, you know, just enough to keep a dozen vintage Bugatti's operational, the two parties, bloodied and weary, grudgingly shake hands and the exit terms are agreed.
Doohan out? His party would currently be saying something like, "Sure... but it is really going to cost you..." My starting point would be the entire contract value, plus lost future earnings, plus all of whatever bonuses were described, plus an inconvenience cost, plus a reputation-damage cost, plus all legal costs... plus a bit more because I've missed out on any chance to drive next year for anyone else... That should be a good, large start point to negotiate from. Flavio will then turn to Colapinto's team and say, "Can you afford this?" And thus the offer, and counter-offer battle commences. At some point either Colapinto's team give-up or Doohan's team capitulates as the number on the flash-cards make their eyes go wide. Given the rumoured size of Colapinto's dragon horde of gold and jewels, I'd be leaning towards Doohan saying "You've got yourselves a deal!" Before they surrender. Everything has a price.
We have people that might know the price of everything and the value of nothing. Some things have a value far beyond dollars, consider those two great guiding items for a life well lived. The load-stone of ethics and the shining North Star of Morals. Darth Domenicali and Flavio might do well to reflect on these, and then also reflect on the following priceless considerations. Not far behind in the priceless league are a respect for history, valuing honour and being a human of clear words which you standby, no matter what. Selling out on these priceless items usually extracts a price. Domenicali and Flavio should ask Herr. Faust how the price he paid worked out for him. In the original version of the story (spoiler alert...) he goes to hell, having messed-up most of his, and others, lives. The story was later revised by Goethe such that Faust's constant labours for good outweigh his pact with the Devil, and he scrapes into Heaven for a human-preferred happy ending.
If Domenicali and Flavio think they know the price of what they are doing they had better hope the price tag was penned by Goethe. Because everything has a price, and they must prepare to pay.
Max Noble
Learn more about Max and check out his previous features, here
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