08/06/2021
NEWS STORY
In his latest post-race debrief, F1 Managing Director, Motorsport, Ross Brawn waxes lyrical over the two-lap sprint that followed Max Verstappen's crash on Sunday.
"I was encouraged to hear a number of commentators say we needed another 10 laps of the action we saw in the final two laps of the Azerbaijan Grand Prix because it acts as a good prequel to sprint qualifying," he writes on the official F1 website.
"Sprint qualifying will be a little longer," he continues, "around 17 to 20 laps, but it could well feature the same type of thrilling racing as drivers won't have to worry about saving tyres."
First off, much like online clickbait, it is the commentator's role to build excitement, turning the most minor of situations into a major event, insisting that the sixty laps of tedium we have just witnessed - and for those about to watch on delayed highlights we salute you - were among the greatest ever witnessed, and that at next week's race - which last year featured only one overtake - we can expect, you've guessed it, the greatest race ever witnessed.
Ross, it's their job!
As for his enthusiasm over Sunday's two-lap sprint, and his suggestion that the forthcoming Sprint Qualifying events, "could well feature the same type of thrilling racing", rubbish!
Following the mayhem of Monza last year, in another of his race debriefs Brawn suggested that the totally unpredictable result that came about after the race was restarted following Charles Leclerc's crash at the Parabolica, and which had seen the 'revised' grid effectively turned around, was a great example of how reverse grids would add more spice to Sunday afternoons.
Thankfully, the proposal was shot down by fans, drivers and the teams.
What Ross really needs to understand is that Monza, and again on Sunday in Baku, was the teams and drivers reacting to a set of circumstances that came about naturally... or unnaturally if you will.
What Ross and his F1 masters are looking for is a means to artificially create such circumstances to their own benefit, to manipulate them deliberately for what Pierre Gasly might describe as "entertainment".
If Ross truly believes that Sunday was a good example of how great sprint races will be, why not return to a proposal put forward by a former F1 boss whose name is rarely mentioned these days... Bernie.
As was his way, following a race which had been turned on its head by a sudden downpour, Bernie suggested putting sprinklers around tracks and turning on the water whenever things got a little boring, after all, changing conditions are the great leveller.
But why stop there.
Another race turned completely on its head was the 2003 British Grand Prix at Silverstone, when defrocked priest, Cornelius Horan ran on to the track in the middle of the race.
Does Ross believe that other than sprinklers placed around the track we should have a couple of former, disaffected clerics on standby for those moments when events get a little processional.
Much is made of the fact that Ross is a poacher turner gamekeeper. Fact is, as a poacher he would have laughed these ideas out of court, and as a team boss he would of rejected them out of hand.
Yet now, as part of the F1 establishment, he gives them his full support, using every opportunity to tell us how good they will be for us.
Indeed, one wonders how long it will be before Ross reveals, courtesy of his race debrief, that tractor production is up again.
Please Ross, remember your racing roots and stop trying to sell us gimmicks.