09/03/2007
NEWS STORY
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Heading to Melbourne for the opening round of the 2007 Formula One World Chamnpionship?
Paul Fauth gives you the insider's guide to the city, not to mention advice on what you need to remember when you use the toilets...
Melbourne's Albert Park is normally the domain of dog walkers, joggers, swimmers (The Aquatic Centre is in the Park), politically correct folk and of course the SAPs (Save Albert Park).
The latter are an incredibly dedicated bunch who have opposed the GP since it came to town in 1996 (when Damon Hill won from Jacques Villeneuve!!). They set up camp and stay there all year. Earnestly they meet in the South Melbourne Library but no one seems to notice!
So for 48 weeks of the year Albert Park resonates to the splashing of swimmers, the panting of joggers, the patter of paws and the slap of sails in Albert Park Lake.
This year the FINA World Championship of Swimmers is being conducted in an artificial pool in the Rod Laver Tennis Arena as it clashes with the GP. Melbourne is in the grip of a fierce drought.
However in 2007 many factors have changed.
The same 3500 kilometres of cable will be laid.
The same 125 kilometres of barriers will be laid ( I am still searching for barrier 1608A that Schumacher smacked last year).
The same seating, hospitality, Paddock Club, beverage and food outlets are being prepared, but something is missing.
The Grand Prix last year lost AUD$21,000,000.
This year the V8 supercars (or taxi cab racing as almost all of the cabs in Australia are General Motors Holdens or Ford Falcons) are missing.
So it is estimated that the GP will lose AUD$26 million this year.
The taxi cabs have been replaced by the "Utes" Holdens and Falcons which SLIDE and SPIN and are driven by people who are not superstars.
Anyway back to what it takes to build a circuit.
About 5 weeks before the GP signs of life appear in the form of contractors in orange vests marking out positions.
Then Clarendon Street South Melbourne, the main access to Albert Park rumbles to the sound of articulated scarring barriers and all the accoutrement of a Grand prix. Except this year the South Melbourne Coles (a down market Tescos) is being redeveloped on Clarendon Street.
Clanging along Clarendon Street, which is so often ignored by the GP crowd is the 112 tram negotiating huge articulated vehicles, building sites and a politically correct council which insists that right turns should be made from the left lane…
Along Clarendon Street are fabulous Hotels such as The Emerald, The Limerick and the Golden Door as well as many excellent restaurants, my favourites being La Firma Pizzeria and Wa Sa Bi Japanese.
There is a great (and free tram) to catch from the CBD as is the 96 Light Rail ( catch it in Bourke Street Mall CBD) both of which are free during the Grand Prix.
On Sunday we had the sad spectacle of Marc Gene in a 2006 F1 Ferrari politically correctly limited to 60 KPH in Lygon Street Carlton the heart of Italy in cosmopolitan Melbourne. This was followed by an entourage of over 100 classic Ferrari celebrating 60 years of the marque.
Meanwhile back in Albert Park the barriers are going up, the seats are being put in place, the corporate places are being evolved. The grass area out of the pits and is being quenched by water from the Albert Park Lake. This is contentious as Melbourne, indeed Australia, is in the grip of a horrendous drought. We are being encouraged to save water. In the toilet the watchword is "If its yellow let it mellow, if it's brown wash it down'
The gravel traps are being sprayed and ING corporate sponsorship is everywhere. Fernando's politically correct helmet and McLaren image with Vodafone conations are everywhere. Toyota has sponsored a tram (no comment). The last team to do this was Jaguar and we all know what happened to them!
So for the first timer to Melbourne what to do.
Get the SKYBUS from the airport (Tullamarine). It will cost AUD$13.50 as opposed to a cab driver who probably does not speak English and will cost you AUD$50 minimum.
The SKYBUS delivers you to Spencer Street (or more politically correct Southern Cross Rail Station) which connects to trams and trains to the CBD and all over Melbourne.
Take the Free City Circle Tram to establish were you are.
To go to Albert Park take the 112 tram from Collins Street or the 96 from Bourke Street, both are free.
Explore Clarendon Street South Melbourne on the 112 Tram, look for Cloudvine wines (great wines and prices) Wa Sa Bi (Great Japanese) (try the Sukiyaki or shab shab and you have to have the gyoza) , La Prima (genuine Italian Pizzas) Limerick Hotel ( a good but not great pub) (the schnitzel is fabulous) and Zappa coffee shop opposite the South Melbourne Library (fabulous coffee).
For entertainment the Butterfly Club, next to Zappa is fantastic. ( A comedy club with attitude).
Avoid the Crown Casino at all costs except for the Ferrari exhibition in the Atrium.
Melbourne has many superb restaurants but Centro in Clarendon Street South Melbourne is a standout ( it has been there for 25+ years) It is BYO which means you are able to bring your own wine and the "GRAPE UNKNOWN" has an outstanding collection of Australian Wines at remarkable prices is next door.
Take the 109 tram to Port Melbourne (from Collins Street) to wonderful but pricy restaurants by the water in Melbourne. The sunsets are fabulous.
Don't drive in Melbourne. The motorists are rude and impatient. The CBD has many "Hook Turns", right turn from the left lane, these are dangerous.
Buy a "Melbourne Transport Map" for AUD$2.00. Melburnians continually bitch about the public transport but it leaves the rest of the world for dead.
Most of the police in Melbourne are honest and helpful but look for the Melbourne Volunteers in their red vests.
The Information Centre in Bourke Street Mall is superb, go there for maps and advice, as is the Metrans Centre located next to the Town Hall in Swanston Street.
"Travellers Aid" is located in Swanston St near Collins Street they are very helpful.
Look up Hare Krisna ( tram no 112) if the money runs out . Free Vegetarian meals.
Stay out of Fitzroy St St Kilda at night as "ICE" has hit the streets here.
Bar Corvina in Fitzroy Street St Kilda does the best (in my option) coffee although it is hard to walk past The Bakery in The Regal first thing in the morning.
New York Pizza Deli in Fitzroy Street St Kilda (96 tram to St Kilda from the GP Entrance does in my opinion the best authentic pizza.
Coles (Tescos by another name) and Safeway Caulfield (no 16 Tram are considerably cheaper than their St Kilda (no.16 tram) equivalents.
Melbourne weather is as best described as "changeable". Carry a brolly, dress light but carry a sweater.
Make sure you visit the "Centre for Moving Images" at Federation Square opposite Flinders Street Station.
The Limerick Hotel (tram 112 from the GP) Park and Clarendon Streets South Melbourne has great $10 meals on Monday night. Try the schnitzel it is AUD$19.50 but worth it.
Make sure you visit South Melbourne Markets (112 tram) and Victoria Markets (Elizabeth Street 19, tram).
Support the pavement artists of Swanston Street.
Enjoy your time in Melbourne. This is the most accessible Grand Prix in the world with free trams to and from the city.
Be kind to us save water remember "if it is yellow, let it mellow if its brown was it down". Take a 6 minute shower at most or save water and shower with a friend.
For the best start to your GP day catch the 16 tram from the city to the Elephant and Wheelbarrow in Fitzroy Street St Kilda, walk to Bar Corvina and have coffee and breakfast and walk to the GP.
To check out our Paul's first pictures from Melbourne, click here