Much like Bernie Ecclestone, Eddie Jordan is of the belief that the presence of A-list celebrities at Grand Prix meetings would do much to help Formula One, whereas dimwits like ourselves foolishly think that improved racing might help.

Speaking at the weekend, Eddie - who has introduced countless (bemused) celebrities to the joys of F1 over the years - revealed that he is considering an ambassadorial role in F1, with Bernie's blessing, and one of his prime objectives is to attract more A-listers.

Formula One is unique when it comes to courting celebrities. Other sports attract celebrities - we've all seen Hollywood stars at big fights, tennis tournaments and even soccer matches - however F1 feels it needs such outsiders to gain credibility. As Mike Lawrence has previously pointed out, surely it is the drivers who should be the stars.

Anyway, the pop singer Pink was one of those A-listers attending the season opener in Melbourne, as was movie star Nicholas Cage.

The laid-back (and how) Californian, nephew of legendary movie director Francis Ford Coppola (The Godfather), has starred in a number of great movies, including Leaving Las Vegas, Raising Arizona, 8MM and Wild at Heart.

British broadcaster ITV's contribution to the galaxy of stars was Jim Carver and June Ackland from The Bill. Both looked - and sounded - wholly nonplussed and under-awed.

Our sources report that Jack Nicholson, Al Pacino and Paul Newman are to appear at Inianapolis.

ITV is inviting the guy from the Halifax commercials and the tall, ugly, and rather camp, hairdresser from the second series of Big Brother - just in case he can't make it, the guy that plays the panda in the Beef Tonight ads in on standy.